Surviving the pandemic VIII: masks, gnocchi, testicles and fashion 

15 Jul 2020

Once I got over the discomfort of looking like a bandit or bank robber from an old western, wearing a mask in public spaces wasn't too bad. There is a certain amount of sweat and discomfort involved - if I don't cover my nose completely, like I'm supposed to, my glasses fog up - but if it protects me, protects those around me, or just makes people more comfortable to be within six feet of me, it is worth it. And in this new normal we are struggling to learn to live in, getting out has become crucial, five months and counting is too long to be confined. 

Chris Mallman and I have been friends for a long time but there have been long stretches where communication was sporadic. I am terrible at staying in touch and apologize to everyone, and there are many, who I have allowed to drift away through my own oblivious inaction. When she called out of the blue, it was a delight as she was determined to go out. Chris runs a fantastic and highly successful company, Wardrobe Workshop (wardrobeworkshop.ca), that produces custom high fashion wardrobes for women who know what they want and how to get it.

(Irrelevant disclaimer: Chris also designed and produced a slick suit that was my favourite costume/outfit when I performed in Drew and the Amazing Sideshow Band. I doubt there is anything sartorial that is beyond her skills.)

Chris proposed that we go to dinner at a restaurant where the chef/owner is the friend of a mutual friend of ours. Covid-19 has not only decimated the arts but it has also laid waste to the commercial culinary arts. Not only was I eager to get out, eager to socialize, eager to eat, but I was also curious as to what dining out would be like in this new normal. How had chefs and restaurateurs adapted?

Chris, she likes to drive, arrived and greeted me with a gift, a face mask. While her company was shut down, only recently resuming fittings and consultations at a much slimmed down rate, as the virus took hold, she decided to put her skills and resources towards a good cause. Maskeraid.ca was born. High fashion and virus protection rolled into one sleek package. Not only do the masks look smart, they are made with an inner layer of non-woven polypropylene which is a necessary ingredient in official medical masks.

And of course she had chosen for me a fabric, Blue Flame, that co-ordinates with my eyes and most of my wardrobe.

Chris isn't the only designer who has branched out. Ed Velasquez of Raw Studio has taken his bulge enhancers and moved them to the facial area (and yes, I am well aware that there is a sniffing joke to made there but I won't). The same comfort that Raw Studio's jockstraps and thongs provide for the boys can now protect newly vulnerable body part(s). Raw Stuido's masks are also highly fashionable with a provocative twist that is understated but titillating. While I wholeheartedly endorse Raw Studio's nether regions garments, I have yet to try one of the masks but, knowing Ed's dedication to comfort and function, I'm sure they are quality and as kind to the face as his other products are supportive of testes and tools.

And, just like a jockstrap, a mask is more fun to take off, or have taken off, than it is to put on. There is a varied selection at rawstudiodesigns.com but be prepared that you will also be unable to resist slipping a jock or "sock" or two into your cart.

Chris and I put our masks on to enter Rocco's Plum Tomato. It was disconcerting to see the usually vibrant dining room empty of laughter and conversation, the chairs piled upon the tables. However when we crossed through into the back patio, we entered another world. Another time when dining and drinking and socializing happened without fear. The charming waiter was able to joke through his mask, and the disposable plastic cutlery was only temporarily jarring. Rocco stood six feet away while he regaled us with stories of his journey to chefdom and the secret of the making of his incredible handmade gnocchi.

Like all businesses struggling to adapt, Rocco's supply chain was also disrupted but again creativity came to the fore. The waiter listed the fresh seafood they had sourced and then had the brilliant idea to combine it with the gnocchi and Chris's favourite rosé sauce. Custom made and consummately delicious.

Robbed of sorely needed human interaction, beyond our quarantine-mates and computer connections, it is heartening to realize that creative solutions and adaptations can bridge the void.
And I can now bravely sally forth, clad in my blue flame armour, and engage with the world as it is evolving.