The Gay AF Christmas Spectacular: "sprinkling mental glitter on your stress-filled brain"

3 Dec 2024.

by Drew Rowsome -Photos courtesy of Gay AF Comedy

If anything is more heartening than children's laughter at Christmas, it's a room full of drunken queers rolling in the aisles in hysterics. What more can I say? The fifth annual Gay AF Christmas Spectacular is packed with seriously funny comedians: Bren D’Souza! Sarah Ashby! Mikael Melo! Sashka DC! And a special visit from Sexy Santa! So we asked a few festive questions of host Robert Watson, songbird Messy Margaret and headliner Martha Chaves to whet your appetite for seasonal mirth.

Drew Rowsome: This is a rather bleak Christmas for most. What gives you hope for the LGBTQ+ community over the holiday season? 

Robert Watson: Oh Drew, what a way to start to an article about a comedy show. It's true that the current political and social climate has been becoming much more hostile to our community, but this year I’ve seen so many things to give me hope: I toured to Alberta in April and Gay AF got the most lovely reception; this summer I saw our Toronto community come together to save a beloved queer institution; and I travelled to small town Prides where the allies most certainly outnumber the enemies. Among the reasons to be vigilant there are also reasons to be optimistic. 

Messy Margaret: Honestly, after the disastrous results of the US election it can be hard to find hope in anything. But, as someone who tries to find the positive in every situation I remain hopeful that our community will stick together and fight against those who seek to send us back in time. Our community has fought many long battles and we're still here and we're still queer.

Martha Chaves: Bleak Christmas? Not on my watch. If they think they can crush our spirit, they’ve got another thing coming. Joy and laughter have been our community’s battle cry for generations, and I’m not about to stop now. I’ll revel so hard, I might just show up dressed as an elf. Try and stop me!

How can the priceless gift of laughter help us cope during this the most hectic of seasons?

Robert Watson: Growing up in my house Christmas wasn’t Christmas until Christmas was ruined, so I know all about hectic holidays. Whenever the community gets together for a Gay AF show, there’s this fabulous relaxed atmosphere knowing that this comedy show is made for us by us. For the Gay AF Christmas Spectacular we always put the “ho” in holiday, I think it’s just what every lovely queerdo needs this season.

Messy Margaret: I take my job as an entertainer very seriously. The art of laughter has always helped to make us feel better during the most trying times. Comedy and drag help us to escape the realities of the outside world. Our shows offer a space where people can exist fully as themselves and they get to be part of what we share on stage.

Martha Chaves: Psychologists say that laughter releases endorphins, otherwise known as the “happy chemicals.” Think of laughter as if it's sprinkling mental glitter on your stress-filled brain.

What makes this Gay AF show so spectacular?

Robert Watson: This is a question that haunts me every year. How are we going to make this year's holiday show more spectacular than the last? We've got dirty parody songs, delicious Messy Margaret drag, and this year the fabulous Martha Chaves is our special guest. And we’ve got a Sexy Santa that may just be our sexiest yet.

Messy Margaret: Toronto is home to many talented comedians and this show has always been a true testament to that talent.

Martha Chaves: The unbridled raging joy that we all bring on stage.

Of those on the bill, whose set are you the most eager to see and why?

Robert Watson: Speaking literally I’m very excited to see Sexy Santa’s set, but if we’re talking comedy it’s so hard to choose. Everyone is bringing a special Christmas or holiday set to the show, I’m eager to see all of them.

Messy Margaret: Sexy Santa of course. I am thoroughly excited to see everyone's work. It's always a joy watching and hearing the other performers do what they do best.

Martha Chaves: This is an unfair question that will make people jealous, and I refuse to answer.

Who on the bill is most likely to go home with Sexy Santa and why?

Robert Watson: Okay, so my husband is an essential help for these shows and we are currently practicing ethical monogamy, so I’m out of the running. I am unaware of Sexy Santa’s relationship status but I can report that it is unlikely he’ll be going home with anyone named Mrs Claus.

Messy Margaret: Me. I'm a shameless hussy.

Who is most likely to get a lump of coal in their stocking and why?

Robert Watson: We are really trying to be net-zero with our emissions so no coal this year. However Bren D’Souza will be receiving some wind turbines.

Messy Margaret: I'm the delusional diva so in my mind I'll be unwrapping a new Tiffany necklaces.

Martha Chaves: Pierre Poilievre because he’s asking for it. He loves coal.

What is the worst Christmas gift you’ve ever received?

Robert Watson: When I was 11 my Grandma gave me an extra large fuchsia colour sweater that I despised, mind you if I was given that today it would fit right in with my wardrobe. Grandma must’ve had a premonition.

Messy Margaret: It's not really what I would call the worst, but it's always so heartbreaking pretending to like clothing that you know you will never wear. I'm such a people pleaser and I could never show anything but gratitude for anything that someone has bought for me.

What is the worst Christmas gift you’ve ever given?

Robert Watson: I worked in the cosmetic and perfume industry for 20 years, it is physically impossible for me to give a bad gift. Also as a gay man I truly believe my friendship is a gift, so take that as you will.

Messy Margaret: Free tickets to one of my shows wrapped up in my own merch bag.

What is the queerest Christmas gift you’ve ever received or given?

Robert Watson: Our niece and nephew got us matching rainbow Santa hats last year and even I question whether I’m gay enough to wear them.

Messy Margaret: My youngest nephew bought me a purple jumpsuit a few years ago. He loves his aunty Messy!?!

Martha Chaves: A unicorn costume me that lights up and sings "I Will Survive.”

What gift do you recommend for those of us who are proudly gay AF?

Robert Watson: A megaphone is the perfect gift for anyone who’s loud and proud. I’ve got several I use myself.

Messy Margaret: A Messy tote bag and Gay AF T-Shirt. You'll never look messier.

Martha Chaves: Laughter of course, in preparation for battle.

What gift would a Gay AF wise man wiseass bring the baby Jesus?

Robert Watson: Babies just love frankincense and myrrh I'm told, but I'd probably just get baby Jesus a paternity test.

Messy Margaret: A book on the Gay Agenda.

Martha Chaves: A disco ball and glitter to decorate the manger.

Would Scrooge or the Grinch or . . . most benefit from attending the Gay AF Christmas Spectacular! And why?

Robert Watson: Any gay Grinch will find their heart growing three sizes if they attend the Gay AF Christmas Spectacular. But if Scrooge reads this and he's changed his ways he should know Gay AF always looking for sponsorship partners.

Messy Margaret: Omg, they would actually make the cutest couple. I think it would help them both relax and realize that being evil isn't as so necessary. Like, relax, sis-it's Christmas.

Martha Chaves: It’s a close race, but I’m giving this one to Scrooge. Sure, the Grinch has his issues, but the Grinch just needed roast beef. Scrooge, on the other hand needs a laugh intervention. One confetti cannon and a sassy punchline later, he’s going to want to be on stage tossing gold coins and yelling, “Drinks on me!” Comedy saves, people.

Mariah Carey. Queen of Christmas or . . .?

Robert Watson: My Queen of Christmas has of course been Messy Margaret these past five years, I love bringing the holiday queer cheer with her every December. We hope to make the season bright and gay. 

Messy Margaret: Yes. And anyone who says otherwise should be banned from Gay Christmas. I would say, though that Kelly Clarkson is a close second.

Martha Chaves: Nope. The OG Queen of Christmas—Mary from Nazareth. I mean, Mariah hits the high notes, but Mary literally delivered the reason for the season without even having sex. You can’t top that.