Vacant verbiage

14 Jan 2025 -

Sometimes I actually despair for mankind, usually when I make the mistake of checking Facebook. A recent post, about the photographer Mark Morrisroe, written either by AI or an equally robotic human moron, used the following “sounds intelligent but doesn’t really mean anything” phrases, such as:

• raw and unflinching style, frequently blurred the lines between art and performance, creating images that were both intimate and confrontational; 
  [translation: a guy took a picture of his friend]
  
  
• vibrant energy of a subculture that thrived on pushing societal boundaries; 
  [translation: they were punks]

• a sense of urgency and intimacy, captured the raw emotions and complexities of those living on the fringes of society; 
  [translation: they were gay]

• reflecting the ongoing dialogues surrounding identity and the body;
   [translation: impossible to define as the phrase really means absolutely nothing]
  
  
• a snapshot of defiance, liberation, and transformation in the face of societal norms.
   [translation: the picture took a minute to shoot]

Honestly, I’ve taken better pictures of my cat, but I don’t describe my photos as “the intersection between personal expression and the broader cultural shifts.” The boy’s ridiculous name is Baby Steffenelli, and if he was at the baths I’d pursue him for more than just a photograph, but nowhere in this picture do I see a raw and unflinching style or a sense of urgency. Such verbiage. It’s reached the point where the minute I see the phoney baloney phrase “explores the intersection between . . . ”, I run in the opposite direction. (And I am not known for being able to run.) 

I like to live in a world of simple, direct language. It’s the writer in me. Why use ten words when one good one will do? But I am increasingly in the minority. Social media seems to encourage people to show off their intelligence even when none is apparent. 

So let’s try my version. “This photo of Baby Spaghetti from 1985 shows that he is a totally hot guy and he smoked. I can’t help but wonder if the photographer and the model got busy after the shoot.”  

I definitely feel that my version is the more accurate one.